Spectrum

I’ve been teetering between two ends of what sometimes seems like a vast spectrum. Black and white. Good and bad. I try to squeeze my dualistic world into at least the gentler version, yin and yang, but it evades me. When at one end of the spectrum all I feel is the lack of the other. Pain. Emptiness. Heart-hurt.

The way through this, I know, is twofold.

One, I can believe in the concept of annica. Impermanence. What I hold in my hand today, in my heart, is fleeting. It will pass. The spectrum expands with me inside it, and I melt into one end from the other.

Two,  I can work toward thinking in a more non-dualistic manner. Advaita. I can believe that the black, the bad, is not inherently black or bad but that only my perception of lack creates such pain when I am at that end of the spectrum.

Perhaps it is not a spectrum at all but a path. A labyrinthine path. Sometimes we pass one another on that path, feeling oh-so-close, and then, still on the path but occupying different points, we move apart again, bound perhaps in an endless vector that leads us yet again to oh-so-closeness.