Closure

I came to Tucson, the dry desertland, just over a week ago not really knowing why I was here save for the fact that I had bought an airline ticket and there were people expecting me. Gem and Mineral Show? Well, yes, and I walked endless rows of jewelry, beads, gemstones, minerals, fossils, and tchotchke, none of which I needed, though I do now have 20 extra pounds of stone people to bring home and share. But other than that? No idea why I was here.

And I resisted being here. Cactus. Bah.

Mostly I felt lack. My heart has been elsewhere. My thoughts have not been on the face of Kali that lies in the bright unforgiving sky and the rocky lunar landscape. I resisted what was offered.

On Day Four I decided to embrace this place as best I could. I was here; why not? Be One with What Is. I knew that the rest of my days here would unfold and I could either be open to what came or … not. Either way, I have a ticket home tomorrow. Why not be curious about what I could learn?

1. I now have clarity I didn’t have before. Yes, time brings clarity and in my time distorted world the past week has really been a month, but the simple act of time passing doesn’t explain the depth of clarity I feel now about What Comes Next.

2. I offered clarity to several people. Simple conversations — asking questions with an intention to create space for clarity to emerge — often yield powerful results. This is one of my superpowers. Score! Clarity for me and clarity for my friends.

3. Creation. Things become more real when you talk about them as if they are real. I set a lot of intention this week through casual conversation.

4. Kali smiled.

I feel complete about the desert. Today I went up into a canyon and sat on a sandy beach next to a snow-fed stream. A brown butterfly whirled around and touched down next to me. I knew it was time to leave, time to begin What Comes Next.

Oh, and tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. No pressure or anything, but I think it will be wonderful.